Posted in 18+, D/s Experiences, Life in General

What do you want?

Thursday night there is a chat on The Safewords Club and I try to join in each week. Over the last few months they he started at about half past 8 and as we have supper at 9 I get to join in for half an hour or so (until MrH says it’s supper time) basically.

Last night I settled into bed and it was just after 8 so I passed some time looking at quilting how to videos (I’m thinking of making a patchwork quilt).

At half past a wandered over the the site and – omg – there were loads of people already there and chatting! Naturally I have totally missed the newsletter which shows the times! Well I said hello and read back….

It was an interesting chat about emotional masochism which I think I have some elements of but it does not necessarily form a huge part of my submission. But it’s always interesting to see how it is affective to others. After all 2 years ago I would have shied away from giving control to MrH.

At 9 MrH came to bed, and as my feet were once again cold, I decided it was snuggle time, so I said good night to my online friends. I took my meds and brushed my teeth. I walked back into the bedroom and although MrH didn’t look up I knew he’d heard me. So I asked if he wanted to do my collar before I got back into bed.

He agreed and after my night collar was fixed into place we got into bed. What was quite unusual at this point was the TV was not on.

“I thought we could talk” he said.

“So, apart from more anal, what else do you want to do more of?”

My heart jumped. I struggle with this. Telling him. But I took a deep breath.

“I’d like more play at home. I mean I love going to hotels together, but really do we do anything we couldn’t do at home?”

We talked for an hour on and off. Not all kink related, but some was. It was so nice and I’m hoping that tonight we talk some more.

We have learned our son is going out tonight. Maybe MrH will decide to do more than talk 😉



I am 43 years old and have been married to MrH for 19 years; we’ve been together for 24. We have 2 boys, young men now really at 19 and 25. I have battled depression and anxiety on and off for the last 10 years and at the moment it’s under control. A few months ago I asked MrH if he would consider adding D/s to our relationship as I wanted explore submission. I’ve always liked it when MrH was more dominant and I wanted him to do this more. Since then we have transitioned into a full time D/s relationship and things have never been better with our relationship.

3 thoughts on “What do you want?

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